The Great Trump Dumpster

Via The San Diego Union Tribune

Via The San Diego Union Tribune


“It’s the Summer of Trump!”, barked the small mouth in the tier below the Hair System of the Donald.

[It has Staff, Mark Halperin was recently spotted bribing them with State Fair discount coo-puns.]

At least that’s what THEY say. Donald is either a closeted and devoted polytheist or has a constant Judgmental Cadre of Trump! experts in his earpiece. Which, yes, is most definitely wired into the-absolutely-greatest-on-earth-the-BEST Hair System. Only Losers rely on Bluetooth. And have contractual obligations to ‘God’.

After giving free helicopter rides to GOP kidlets in Iowa after describing how he’d handle ISIS, then offered details on that pesky illegals and immigration problem and The Great Wall of Trump!; Donald was showing a little swagger. Extra swagger. And as Trump is an infamous germaphobe that bird might have been relegated to eBay next to his friend half-Governor Sarah Palin’s unwanted and yet unsold second-hand state-of-Alaska ‘luxury’ airplane. As CNN described the festival of fun:


“We have quite a few children gonna take rides today,” said Donald Trump, billionaire, celebrity, entertainer and Republican candidate for president. “Where are the children? Get them over here.”

Half a mile northwest, beyond the railroad tracks and the Laurel Hill Cemetery, the Iowa State Fair proceeded as usual.

You could see a cow made of butter or a 711-pound Giant Atlantic Pumpkin. You could eat a bacon-wrapped rib on a stick and drink a 32-ounce Miller Lite while watching a one-man band play and sing “Mustang Sally.” You could strap into a ride called Slingshot, whose giant elastic bands would fling you toward the pale blue sky.

But here in the parking lot was something else altogether: a chance to ride in a customized Sikorsky S-76B helicopter with one of the richest and most famous men in America.


Kevin Siers, The Trump Shrug

Kevin Siers, The Trump Shrug


Trump’s vulgarian swoop into unforgettable presence in the heart of Iowa Poli-Hijinks in Olde Run-up August amongst the American Political nativists and their historical followers of record, moved the direction of the herd more than that once with the helicopter and the other times when he would benignly nod as staff ushered favored media like Chuck Toad of Red Meat the Press (why waste Sunday morning free coverage? while he’s still ‘Uge?) aboard Trump Hair Force One for a barrage of speed date interviews. Odious but interesting tape below.



If you can call them that. In my opinion more than three minutes of The Donald is officially a full-on late-night informercial, more than 27 minutes of scripted footage and you’re in Short Wackadoo Documentary land.

Presumably he’ll next tool the lahg-est Trump yacht up and slip her into the nearest and commodious enough port between Boston and Kennebunkport.


Bless Maddow for having given us memory updates on Trump! of years past in the zeitgeist. Her Tale of the Tape segments last week were fun for the whole family and delightfully uncomfortable for the unholy and unruly herd of candidates.  The equitable hand of good journalism is such a rare spotting these days. 



That’s not quite as fun as the old Pizza Hut advert, but worth a true keen gander … a man should make some changes in thirty years besides upgrading the fully-beautiful wives every decade or so.

Paul Fell Cartoons

Paul Fell Cartoons


But how tired are you of hearing comparisons between Trump! and Bernie?!! That’s really grinding my knickers of late, and just because they say ‘Uge in similar fashions does not a valid parallel make. I think Bernie would have more balls {Hell, Hillary has a Titanium pair} against Trump in a duel. Not the Pew Poll, an actual duel.

“I’m liking this more than I figured,” Trump drawled to Fvx Nation puppet Sean Hannity in an Exclusive(!!) recently … which is nauseating considering that he’s already throwing millions and millions of dollars at a lark.

As some claim blindness to race in the post-racist world we’re now privy to, Trump! fails to acknowledge warts, faults or Achilles heels. No one has anything to teach him, except perhaps God because the Bible DID outsell The Art of the Deal yet he doesn’t feel he needs to discuss his business with ‘God’. While that’s refreshing among a field who usually distinguish themselves by claiming a direct phone line, it’s no help with the Egoiste in the Room.

I’ll say it again … we simply cannot elect/be purchased or be led by The Ugly American. [And he has dubious spawn. VOTE!]

Luckovich via Go Comics.

Luckovich via Go Comics.


Admittedly, it was a hoot to hear Trump! declare Romney “NOT rich”. Yep, this is what the Founding Fathers dreamed of.

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