Yes, it’s time to steal a few more jokes from my father-in-law (F.I.L.). His blog posts range from political comedy to humorous commentary on pop culture.
For those of you who might be new here, he used to write for Alan King, Milton Berle and Jonathan Winters, just to name a few. And all those Dean Martin Roasts, too: Don Rickles, Red Buttons, Phyllis Diller, Sammy Davis, Jr., etc. A tiny respite from all the frustrating events of the day:
Even though he was fired, David Blackburn says, STEVE BANNON can leave the White House with his head and right arm held high.
TRUMP went off script and totally reversed his earlier statement about Charlottesville, saying there’s blame on “both sides.” If you don’t think TRUMP’S statements are racist, you should at least know that racists are happy he made them. Immediately following, former KKK leader DAVID DUKE thanked TRUMP. Now, there’s a thank-you note you don’t hang on your refrigerator.
When TRUMP said, “The hate and the division must stop,” for a minute, the crowd got excited. They thought TRUMP was resigning.
During the TRUMP statement, White House Chief of Staff JOHN KELLY was seen staring at the ground with his arms crossed. And after hearing the press conference, so was the Statue of Liberty.
These remarks were during a press conference supposed to be about infrastructure and they were terrible. The first rule of infrastructure is, whatever you do, don’t burn bridges.
Meanwhile, Vice President MIKE PENCE cut his trip to Central America short to come back to Washington. With all this going on, he was in the White House measuring the drapes.
DONALD TRUMP completely disbanded his manufacturing council after eight members quit in 48 hours. The way these CEO’s were leaving TRUMP, you’d think they were married to him.
The CEO of the 3M company also resigned, and when TRUMP asked why, he said, “3M doesn’t want to be associated with three K’s”.
Forget creating new manufacturing jobs in this country. TRUMP can’t even create a manufacturing council.
KIM JUNG UN says he’s decided not to fire missiles at Guam. Then TRUMP said, “You mean I learned where Guam was for nothing?”
North Korea has backed off its threat to launch a nuclear missile at Guam. So now the title of “Crazy Tyrant Most Likely to Destroy America” returns to the defending champion, DONALD TRUMP.
A 98-year-old woman and a 94-year-old man in New York just got married. If you want to get them a gift, better hurry!
The lovely couple are registered at “Bed, Bath and the Great Beyond.”
Monday morning is “Eclipse Day” and teachers in L.A.are afraid some kids looking up at the sun might not be able to protect their eyes. Not to worry. These kids haven’t looked up from their phones since January.