“Last Blog Standing” starts riiight….now!
Yes, it’s time to steal a few more jokes from my father-in-law (F.I.L.). His blog posts range from political comedy to humorous commentary on pop culture.
For those of you who might be new here, he used to write for Alan King, Milton Berle and Jonathan Winters, just to name a few. And all those Dean Martin Roasts, too: Don Rickles, Red Buttons, Phyllis Diller, Sammy Davis, Jr., etc.
A tiny respite from all the frustrating events of the day:
Texas senator and tea party favorite TED CRUZ announced he’s running for President. He pledged to lead America boldly forward into the 1950s.
It also means he’s one step closer to being a Fox News analyst.
If elected the “West Wing” would go directly to the “Right Wing.”
People are questioning if TED CRUZ can legally run for President because he was born in Canada. And the last thing we want to do is pave the way for a PRESIDENT JUSTIN BIEBER.
CRUZ released a Presidential campaign video in Spanish. He explained, “It’s important for me to reach out to people I plan to have deported.”
TED CRUZ came here from Canada, his father came to the United States from Cuba, and yet he’s against immigration. Also, after years of bashing it, CRUZ signed up for “Obamacare.” Looks like what’s pre-existing with CRUZ is an acute case of a “Hypocrite-ical condition.”
Can you imagine TED CRUZ as President? And you think the Secret Service is drinking NOW.
The PRESIDENT and HILLARY CLINTON had lunch at the White House this week. Of course HILLARY had a private server.
A new report says the U.S. faces a severe shortage of doctors. In fact, things got so bad that yesterday a triple bypass was performed at “Jiffy Lube.”
During an interview with Playboy Magazine, DICK CHENEY said that PRESIDENT OBAMA is the worst President in his lifetime. Immediately afterward, readers of Playboy said CHENEY was the worst centerfold in THEIR lifetime.”
This week is the beginning of the eight-day Jewish holiday of PASSOVER. Celebrating the time when the Jews where freed from slavery and Moses led them to the sea and sand — In other words, history’s first Spring Break.
During Passover no regular baked goods can be eaten, only unleavened bread called matzos. In keeping with the fiber craze, this year bakers will offer a new variety. Whole wheat and bran matzo fortified with Metamucil. It’s called “Let My People Go.”
