Yes, it’s time to steal a few more jokes from my father-in-law (F.I.L.). His blog posts range from political comedy to humorous commentary on pop culture.
For those of you who might be new here, he used to write for Alan King, Milton Berle and Jonathan Winters, just to name a few. And all those Dean Martin Roasts, too: Don Rickles, Red Buttons, Phyllis Diller, Sammy Davis, Jr., etc.
A tiny respite from all the frustrating events of the day:
Britain’s vote to leave the European Union sent Wall Street plummeting over 600 points. Stocks went down so fast my Blue Chips turned white.
The last time something came down this fast it was a pair of pants and BILL CLINTON was in them.
Democrats held a big sit-in on the House floor to protest Congress’ refusal to vote on gun control and it live-streamed to over 3 million views. Which is why Congress got picked up for two seasons on Netflix.
House Speaker PAUL RYAN has unveiled a Republican alternative to Obamacare to take care of the country’s medical needs. It’s called “Eat An Apple Every Day.”
HILLARY CLINTON is burying DONALD TRUMP, $42 million to $1.3 million, in campaign money. I always knew those huge skyscrapers were overcompensating for something in TRUMPS pants. I just never dreamed it was his wallet.
After listening to HILLARY’S and TRUMP’S hard hitting speeches this week a new poll came out claiming that 25 percent of voters remain undecided. They don’t know whether to move to Canada or Mexico.
TRUMP is calling on BERNIE SANDERS’ supporter’s to support him instead. TRUMP said, “Forget about my policy positions. Just focus on our New York accents and our crazy hair.”
A record-breaking heat wave hit Los Angeles this week. In Beverly Hills it was 112. Of course, because it was Beverly Hills, it only looked 90.
It was so hot in Woodland Hills, a lizard was spotted putting on “Right Guard.”
Reporters were asking DONALD TRUMP to explain his foreign policy, just so they could get the chills.
To keep cool in Sherman Oaks, Baskin Robbins was selling ice cream in cups, cones and suppositories.
In Hollywood, GEORGE HAMILTON was seen putting on sun screen.
My advice to anyone without an air conditioner; get “UBER” to pick you up, and tell the driver, “Alaska, and step on it.”
According to statistics, nearly one million adults in the U.S. are in a same-sex marriage. That’s compared to the nearly forty million adults in a no-sex marriage.
There’s a lot of controversy around the summer Olympic Games. Russia’s track and field team are barred from the competition after allegations of use of performance enhancing drugs. In the U.S. BOB COSTAS was warned of being banned from announcing the games for use of too much Teeth Whitening.