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Need a laugh? Time for Another Stand-Up Political Comedy Blog

Yes, it’s time to steal a few more jokes from my father-in-law (F.I.L.). His blog posts range from political comedy to humorous commentary on pop culture.

For those of you who might be new here, he used to write for Alan King, Milton Berle and Jonathan Winters, just to name a few. And all those Dean Martin Roasts,  too: Don Rickles, Red Buttons, Phyllis Diller, Sammy Davis, Jr., etc.

A tiny respite from all the frustrating events of the day:

House Republicans unveiled their new healthcare plan intended to replace Obamacare. The previous healthcare plan was nicknamed “Obamacare,” and if this new plan doesn’t work, it will be nicknamed “Obama’s Fault.”

If Obamacare were struck down over 20 million people would once again have to go without health insurance. They’d have to go back to finding a doctor they could afford. One who they’d hear a lot of dogs barking in the waiting room.

–They’d have to go to a doctor who, on his wall there would be a “Man Of The Year” award — from Forest Lawn.

–A doctor who’s medical diploma is signed by MARCUS WELBY.

–One who’s M.D. on his diploma stands for “Many Disasters.”

–Their Mammograms would be done at “Hooters.”

–Their best health advice would be “An Apple A Day.”

–If they wanted a second opinion they would have to find a schizophrenic doctor, so they could get it in one visit.

–For erectile dysfunction, forget about Viagra. they’d have to use a popsicle stick and duct tape.

Last week we had “A Day Without Women” and women across the country protested by refusing to work. That morning I asked my Apple’s iPhone voice, SIRI a question and she said, “Look it up yourself asshole.” And then she slapped me.

Of course, with the First Lady still living in New York, with PRESIDENT TRUMP, every day is “A Day Without Women.”

According to a recent poll, First Lady MELANIA TRUMP’S approval rating has increased to 52 percent since the inauguration. And her “feel sorry for her” rating shot up over 90 percent.

At the White House this week, PRESIDENT TRUMP gave advice to a group of school children and he told them to “work hard.” TRUMP also told them, “If your dad offers you a million dollars, say yes.”

He also welcomed the first group of new visitors to the White House since he became President. It was a little awkward. One of them was MELANIA.

In New York city, the Statue of Liberty went dark for an hour due to an unplanned power outage. When asked for an official statement, the Statue said that she just wanted some “me” time.

March 17th is “Saint Patrick’s Day.” A day when Irish people all over the world commemorate their Patron Saint’s driving all the snakes out of Ireland. Republicans are now working on declaring March 18th as “Saint Trump’s Day.” They want to honor the PRESIDENT for driving all the Democrats out of Washington.

Yes, March 17th is “The Wearin’ Of The Green” and a month later the Internal Revenue Service celebrates the “Sharin’ Of The Green.”

RadioShack has filed for bankruptcy for the second time. Experts say, if RadioShack goes bankrupt one more time it can officially run for President.

This week marks the beginning of Daylight Savings Time, but be careful. Last year a woman got a hernia trying to reset her biological clock.

By |March 13th, 2017|Tags: |0 Comments