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Whether bloody sport or contentious reality show, the 2016 primary season has

[thus far, I know we are all excited about the Joe Biden Elizabeth Warren assignation] precisely two strong dames to keep on opposite sides of the ropes. But are they both actually competing for the only Oval Office?

For example … are we now looking at Carly You’re So Vain Fiorina running like she’s in an IronWoman and headed for the coveted finish line of of GOP Veep? Presumably for either The Donald or Los Bush. Even typing that out makes me hang my head in shame when I think of how the rest of the world is taking this crass spectacle.
 
We know they have to feel the pressure to once again choose a decent politician with factory standard boobs and a uterus to undo years of their own asshattery. And something tells me the Ashley Madison Male Scarlet Letter Info Dump [now with explicit pics in the third leak] has put women in possession of all kinds of leverage on levels that should be fascinating to watch take shape. 
 
 
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Men, again, keep it behind the zipper … or get outta’ of politics if you have no more control to summon over your libido than you did at age 15, o-kaay?  Seriously Dudes. You are making the Fiorinas and Palins look … better.

The Mean Girl candidacy of Carly Fiorina enjoyed a roller coaster August ride this week, beginning with her be-flanneled showing at the Iowa State Fair and culminating in the de rigeur Red Meat the Press gauntlet.

By Mean Girl I refer to the types of unfortunates who necessitated the Madeleine Albright Rule; the certainty that there’s a special circle of hell in place for women that don’t help other women. We have a such a ‘uge choice beautiful best banquette reserved for La Palin, Phyllis Schaefly (SP) and Peggy Noonan, Queen of Untruthiness.

 

Chuck Toad Todd predictably conducted a softball interview that came off as more of a skit about an awkward ‘modern media’ Fail that could bloom into an HBO pilot with the proper cast. See what you think:

 
 

 

 

HRC bashing was inevitable, she scored some hits and by doing so revealed just how very Mean Girl she is prepared to go. Look out Hillary. That Secret Service detail is perhaps less of a bad optic now? Fiorina looks like she could do a Hell on Heels country beat down on another woman as soon as she could ditch the designer handbag.

 
 
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Fiorina is certainly, unequivocally and annoyingly more dangerous than say your Michele Batshite Bachmann’s of the Regressive Rethugs of Now. She has (or once had) a functioning brain firing off faster and on far more Yee Haw(!) synopses than the below average GOP norm.

If you knee-jerk disagree, or have more insight than moi, see if this clip makes a difference in perspective on a woman who may have ‘run Hewlett Packard’ into the ground … but gave us Demon Sheep. #BestCampaignAdEverToMock

 

On with the Orvis High Water Waders — you know you’re bound to step in something objectionable at the State Politics Fair or Anti-bellum Sounding GOP-wtf-BBQ du lazy summer campaign week.

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How is this hatchet-wielding, Coulter Speaking Regressive possibly going to convince women that she has our interests at heart or in policy? Laughable hoax. Big-Businesswoman-Robo Carly evinces about as much empathy as the Rethugs muster for Borned American Children.

 

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Carly and The Butter Cow. Getty Images.

Carly and The Butter Cow. Getty Images.